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TUCoPS :: General Information :: messcomp.txt

Messing with someone's computer - by Archangel




From: archangel@almighty.com (Archangel)

This is a list of things that you can do to lamers who think they know
everything about computers. MOST OF THIS STUFF IS SO SIMPLE THAT YOU
WILL FEEL LAME JUST DOING IT! See how long it takes 'em to figure it
out, then show them how lame they are by fixing the problem quickly.

These ideas should be especially useful to the beginners in this
newsgroup, old-schoolers will probably barf when they read this. Ok?

Change the prompt on someones computer to be black on black. This is
rather cruel if the person is computer illiterate. Very effective the
day before a big project is due.

It is possible to play sounds remotely on some workstations. (Sun
SparcStations for instance) You can have all kinds of fun playing
sounds like flushing toilets and other unusual sounds. Works best if
the person is a relative newbie.

Run a XXX-GIF slide show on the overhead computer projectors found in
many computer rooms and large lecture halls. Very effective if done
before a large class. You may wish to superglue the drive doors shut
as well as all the relevant power switches in the "on" position and
the power cables to the wall and hide the keyboard.

Write a small program that prints "Formatting C:" and starts printing
a series of dots at intervals afterwards. Simulate disk access by
contiuously creating and deleting an empty text file.

Write a daemon that sends each individual page of a print job to a
different printer on the network. Select the printer at random.

Put an intercom inside a machine and then convince some nerd that it
is an AI with voice recognition.

Convince a lamer that there has been a virus going around that
presents hypnotic patterns on the screen which can really mess up your
mind. Then start up remotely or set to start at a particular time a
fractal program of some sort. They'll probably panic big time.

Write a TSR that turns the keyboard on and off at short intervals.
You'll watch the person try keyboard after keyboard. Can also swap
keys using ANSI.SYS or xmodemap depending on the system.

Convert a XXX image to a bitmap and make it someone's OS/2 or Windows
backround. You can also change the backround of someone's X-Windows
session remotely as well as make picture appear and they can't stop
you.(use XV or a similar program)

Rig the spring in a Macintosh floppy drive to fire the disk a goodly
distance from the machine upon ejection.  This one is hilarious!

Reverse the turbo switch so that the machine runs fast when it should
run slow and slow when it should be fast.

If they haven't changed the default password for their BIOS, change it
yourself and lock them out of their machine.

Write fake disaster error messages that appear at random times.

Archangel
Wrath of God Hand Delivered



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