AOH :: SPIDER.TXT|
"Modern Medicine" by Roger Holler - Strange future medicine for your ponderin' mind
by Roger Holler
As the century turned we found ourselves in the favorable position of
having solved the most intimate secrets of our genes. Powerful
computers and complex amino acid baths, aided by high resolution
molecular scanning allowed us to map the complete DNA sequences of
millions of people. From these we were able to create specific
biomolecular models for ideal cellular metabolism that could be
adapted to the specific needs of individual members of any race.
Alas, the ratio of instruments for medical research and vitality
synthesis to the oppressive number of people populating our planet
left not a glimmer of hope that these modern miracles of medicine
might be used to serve the common person. The great satisfaction
enjoyed with the culmination of our medical skills was severely
mitigated by the virtual impossibility of applying our wealth to the
service of humanity.
Then this odd prophetic poem came to light:
A Visit to the Surgeon, A.D. 2051
T'was a jolly wicked spider's bonny bite
that stole away the pain that was my spite,
and gave me rest from hurt that made me wish my life'd desert
and let me sleep at peace a little more.
The nasty nimble spider's claws did prick,
as 'e climbed about me: Nickety! Nick! Nick!
I tried to brush 'im 'way,
for which 'e bit my hand and stayed,
and set to work upon my painful sore.
The clever crafty spider's job begun
with incisions which 'e closed with silk 'e spun.
And while 'e was inside, about and about 'e pried,
tucking up the bits with which 'e'd done.
The viral germy spider left a mob
of mitey organisms deep inside,
wot settl'd the dispeptics of my own organal stew,
and left me feeling whole; like I was new.
Say bonny wicked spider:
How'd y' do?
Research in microbial and viral agricultural tools was already far
ahead, stabilising the global food chain. Ditto that research applied
to toxic hazards. Our skies were turning green with the micro-florae
that cleansed the air of chemicals and dust, returning to earth as
valuable fertilizers. With the advent of our detailed knowledge of
biochemistry there was little danger of allergy, infection or
toxicity; fear for which had curbed earlier deployment of these
remarkable synthetic organisms. The new micro-organisms were jacketed
with proteins that are inert to the animal metabolisms.
Quid pro quo, the mechanisms learned from medicine that allowed the
safe use of new viruses and microbes in environmental engineering,
were met with applications of mutagenic sciences that lead to the
organic reprogramming of human metabolisms.
New viruses were chief among the modern treatments synthesised.
Viruses in particular were most useful, as they naturally invade and
manipulate a host's DNA. These tiny, scarcely living bits of protein
were designed to selectively reconstruct the faulty bits of genes
responsible for various diseases, to provide inhibitors for the by-
products of other faulty genes, or function in lieu of still others.
The greater part of the impetus which solved the riddle of human
genetics was the misfortunate appearance of AIDS. The first
application of an artificial infectious cure was the introduction of
an altered HIV that not only prevented the deadly HIV from infecting
exposed people, but also neutralised the action of deadly HIV already
present. There was then great trepidation regarding the introduction
of this new virus, as it must be spread throughout the population to
be effective. Now everyone carries the benign form of last century's
greatest killer organism as an inherited symbiont.
Cancer and organic diseases were of primary interest to researchers.
However, advanced cases of these ailments inevitably wrought extensive
damages to tissues which often remained after the initial cause of the
disease was cured. Patients granted the boon of the new microbial
elixirs might be stabilised but remain severely impaired. The option
of surgery remained beyond the resources of the common person, hence
few people ever benefited from full restoration from the aftermath of
Here, the crafty nimble spider was the unsought solution. Quick to
breed, the simple arachnids were cautiously tamed by biochemical
tropisms and inhibitions to do the finer work of lasers. Lest the
patient bleed too much, great beetles were trained to respond to the
pheronomic signals of spiders, who in turn might not proceed until the
beetle's pheronomes had signalled it was firmly clamped in place to
retard the flow of blood from arteries or veins.
The hive behaviors of ants and termites were adapted to the
organisation of the medical bugs. Chemical analysis was performed by
minute ingestion of tissue samples. The insect's metabolic responses
to the samples were pheronomes instructing their cousins and brethren
how to proceed. This specialisation of work included the conveyance
of appropriate microbes and viruses to tissues requiring their help.
Even cancer was turned to a useful purpose. Where organic damage was
too severe for insects and microbes to cure, tumor buds, implanted by
insects and tended by viruses, were grown to specification as
alternatives to the failing natural organs. The organs replaced could
then be speedily and devourously removed.
Broken bones also became the province of the new symbiotic medicine.
The spiders proved able to induce a patient's muscles to manipulate
and set his own bones, so that microbes could then hasten them to knit
sturdily. The awkward casts of the past were quickly made obsolete
and have been virtually forgotten.
A further unexpected and amazing outcome was the arachnids'
extraordinary sensitivity to the bio-electrical junctions used by
acupuncturists. The great monster spider that greets a patient today
is responsible for a variety of complete treatments, as well as
preparing a patient for any further necessary treatment. This great
spider does indeed bite, but only once. Thereafter the patient drifts
blissfully awake, aware and secure in the comfort of humanity's
greatest friends, who once were considered only pests and plagues.
Note: This story was inspired by the spider, which visited the author early
on morning after two days when the pain was so extreme he could not sleep.
The spider applied an accu-puncture/pressure therapy and the pain vanished
nearly instantly, a highly memorable occasion. The origins of the spider
have been speculated upon here. The author has had other visitors from the
futures which is how he learned the sky was green.
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