AOH :: THRONE.TXT|
Royal Canadian Air Farce's Throne Speech
Well, it's Throne Speech time again here in B.C. so I thought I'd take
this time to transcribe a great little sketch from the CBC Royal
Canadian Air Farce, blatently ignoring copyright laws. Enjoy!
Audience: (Rumblings, general chatter in the parliament)
"Quiet in the house.. quiet... please. As speaker of the house, I now
declare this full sitting of parliament well and truly in deep session.
Now, Governer General Ray Hanashitan will read the speech from the
throne in English and something close to Canada's other official
"Merci, et maintenance je would likez to readez la speech de la
"Ummm... speak in English?"
"I thought I was. At this point, I'd like to read the speech from the
"Members of parliament, people of Canada....list of good things the
government has done, good thing, good thing, good thing, pause for
applause. Good thing, good thing, good thing, special praise for the
prime minister, pause for standing ovation. Good thing, good thing,
good thing, token compliment for the opposition. Then, good thing,
cliche, gratuitous mention of the queen, and on, and on, and on. En
eutre choixe en Francais. Promise of tax break, promise, promise,
promise, greatest government ever, thank you very much."
"Thank you for that almost moving speech. Next order of business: the
Prime Minister will address the house as soon as he does his funny
MULRONEY (deeeeeeeep voice)
"Hi. How ya doin'? Mr. Speaker. Good thing, good thing, good thing.
Blarney, blarney, brag, brag, boast, bulls___, greatest prime minister
in the history of Canada. I udnerstand the average Canadian's problems.
Every Canadian has one thing in common: we all have to work for a
looney. Blarney, blarney, good thing, greatest prime minister..."
(voice fades off as Club Med theme comes in)
"This has been 15 minutes of Club Parliament. Can you imagine a whole
* Origin: Altered Productions ù Sunshine Coast BC E-Mail Centre (89:686/0)
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