A Short Guide to Comparative Religions:

Taoism              Shit happens.
Confucianism        Confucius say, "Shit happens."
Calvinism           Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
Buddhism            If shit happens, it isn't really shit.
Seventh Day         No Shit on Saturdays.
   Adventist         
Zen                 What is the sound of shit happening?
Hedonism            There's nothing like a good shit happening.
Hinduism            This shit happened before.
Mormonism           This shit is going to happen again.
Islam               If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
Moonies             Only happy shit really happens.
Stoicism            This shit is good for me.
Protestantism       Let the shit happen to someone else.
Catholicism         Shit happens because you are BAD.
Hare Krishna        Shit happens rama rama.
Judaism             Why does this shit always happen to us?
Zoroastrianism      Shit happens half the time.
Christian Science   Shit is in your mind.
Atheism             No shit.
Existentialism      What is this shit, anyway?
Rastafarianism      Let's smoke this shit.
 
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