AOH :: FARMER.TXT

A farmer's guide to computers


A FARMER'S GUIDE TO COMPUTERS
=============================

BATCH - A 'Whole Lot' like the batch of biscuits my wife bakes for breakfast.

BIT - The part of the bridle that goes in the horse's mouth.

BYTE - What the horse might try to do when you put the bit in its mouth.

CALLING SEQUENCE - Rules for a Hollerin' Contest.

CHARACTER - Wendell Smith up the road. He could make a dog laugh.

CHIP - My son. My wife says he's off the old block!

CONVERSION - What happens to some folks at our Spring Revival.

DEBUG - Picking beetles off plants and dropping them into a can of kerosene.

DEBUGGING AIDS - Grandchildren.

DISKETTE - What you do to a field after you plow it.

DOCUMENTATION - What the Vet does.

ECHO CHECK - Hollerin' twice from the same place.

FIXED FIELD - It's ready to plant.

GARBAGE - I haul it off myself.

INPUT - Labor, seed, and fertilizer.

JOB STACKING - Working in the hayfield.

KEYBOARD - The beam above the kitchen door where we keep the keys.

MAIN MEMORY - My wife's - She never forgets anything.

MENU - It all depends on what's in season.

MODEM - What I did with my oats before Job Stacking.

OUTPUT - Crop from my 'Input'.

RAM - Ramses Rogers down the road. Drives a red pickup.

ROM - Ram's twin brother. He drives a red pickup too. Can't tell 'em apart
      execpt for their mufflers.

SECONDARY MEMORY - My dad's. If my wife can't remember it, my dad can.
                   He'll be 93 next month!!







     Another file downloaded from:                     NIRVANAnet(tm)

     & the Temple of the Screaming Electron              415-935-5845
     Just Say Yes                                        415-922-2008
     Rat Head                                            415-524-3649
     Cheez Whiz                                          408-363-9766

   Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
       arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality,
       insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.

  Full access for first-time callers.  We don't want to know who you are,
   where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.

                         "Raw Data for Raw Nerves"



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